Mentoring – The key to success.

Mentoring – The key to success.

A journey that unlocks rewards for yourself and others.

Mentoring is a process that builds personal and professional skills and attributes for both parties, the mentee and the mentor. While the mentee is seeking guidance and feedback from the mentor, the mentor is discovering gaps and misunderstandings within their own knowledge, skills, beliefs and feelings. As both the mentor and mentee contribute to the mentoring process and both parties receive feedback on the milestones and successes during the process, both the mentee and the mentor will experience growth, personally or professionally, or both. It is due to the richness of their relationship that insight is gained and exchanged and the rewards of mentoring are unlocked.

The term Mentor

The term Mentor appears to have originated some 3000 years ago from the Ancient Greek poem, Homer’s Odyssey “The adventures of Telemachus, the son of Ulysses”. Here, Homer states that Odysseus entrusted his young son Telemachus to the care of Mentor, his trusted companion, when he left to fight in the Trojan War. This fable shows that the relationship of mentor and mentee is filled with trust and care for one another and that a strong relationship exists between a mentor and mentee. This relationship is key to the mentee achieving their goals and the mentor gaining insight into their own as well as the mentee’s skills and beliefs.

Your role in mentoring

From childhood to adulthood, most of us have been mentored, in one form or another. Parents, teachers, clergy, friends have all had a hand in assisting us develop our knowledge, skills, beliefs, feelings and perceptions of the world around us. Now as working adults, we look at where we are and set personal and professional goals to gain a place in the world we hope to belong to in the future. As a mentee, we seek a mentor to guide us on the path to our desired future and as a mentor we seek to support others while at the same time undertaking reflective self-discovery.

Finding a mentor

After much reading, it appears that many wish to become a mentee of a wise and experienced mentor but do not know how to identify a mentor and establish a mentoring relationship. Generally, the mentor-mentee relationship is one-on-one; but there are situations where small groups of mentees are in a mentoring relationship at the same time. Examples of group mentoring include company inductions and on-boarding.

Finding a mentor can be as simple as observing those around you to identify one or more people who demonstrate knowledge and skills that you wish to be able to perform. A mentor shows you how to gain new skills whereas a coach aims to increase existing skills. That is why a mentor needs to also reflect on their own knowledge and skills to ensure they are capable of assisting the mentee achieve their goals.

There are many ways to contact a mentor, once you have identified the most appropriate individuals (Plural as you may wish to have more than one mentor. Your mentors may have different skills sets that are relevant for different goals).  A few ways to consider include making contact (e.g. arrange a meeting) and making a direct request. Your proposed mentor will acknowledge your admiration of their achievements and if they have the time available and are willing, will be pleased to take part in your growth and development.

At times, in the world of work, a more formal mentoring process is necessary. For these situations, you may need to involve human resources or the training department within the organisation. In these circumstances, a mentoring contract may be requested. The mentoring contact will set out the roles and responsibilities of the mentee and mentor as well as indicate schedules of mentoring sessions, feedback records, mentoring reporting proformas and expectations of the mentoring process.

 Structuring mentoring sessions

Mentoring sessions need to be well planned. It is of no importance whether the mentoring sessions are informal or formal, they still need to be well planned to ensure both the mentee and mentor are prepared and aware of what to expect. When human resources or training departments have made formal arrangements, specific mentoring procedures will be in place and probably forms for recording the mentoring session outcomes. However, for both informal and formal mentoring sessions, use of a mentoring session model will assist both the mentee and mentor in achieving the desired goals and results for each session.

Two common mentoring models that can assist in structuring mentoring sessions are GROW and the Five Cs.

GROW model

GROW is an acronym for Goal, Reality, Obstacles, Options and Way forward. This model focuses on the aims of the mentoring session and uses question/response techniques to form agreements and confirmations on: what will be achieved, reality and honesty on situations, identifying issues and opportunities, plus gaining mentee and mentor commitment. It is the mentor’s role to guide the discussion in this model.

GROW Example

Source: https://www.gla.ac.uk/media/Media_414501_smxx.pdf

Five Cs model

The path of the 5Cs model commences with Challenge and moves to Choices, Consequences, Creative Solutions and Conclusions. This model may be followed sequentially or the session stages can be mixed according to the circumstances evidenced during the mentoring session. It is the mentor’s role to use question/response techniques to push and pull the discussion in this model. Pushing relates to stimulating and challenging the mentee with ideas and options that the mentee considers to be of value. Pulling is when safety, security and support are provided. Mentors generally pull more than push during mentoring sessions. The Five Cs model suits sessions where the mentee faces a challenge and needs assistance to identify options to deal with a situation. The model can also assist when the mentee presents a number of options for a situation and the mentor wishes the mentee to explore these in order to find the best solution.

5Cs Example:

Source: https://www.keele.ac.uk/media/keeleuniversity/lpdc/The%20Five%20Cs%20Model%20of%20Mentoring.docx

Mentors need to be trained

Although people may self-identify as a mentor and believe their experience makes them suitable, mentoring has a number of facets due to the psychology and sociology involved with individuals working together to achieve specific objectives. The mentor carries a great responsibility of not just knowing what to do and when, but also how to support the mentee that satisfies both the mentee and the mentor. As mentioned earlier, both the mentor and mentee will experience personal and professional growth during the mentoring process.

The mentor needs to be prepared for the responsibility of assisting and supporting a mentee. Not only do they need to reflect on their own existing skills, but they also should consider their ability to use strategies and techniques that will support, stimulate and challenge the capacity of a mentee. Mentor training is the key to a successful mentoring partnership.

Mentors need to be empathic in order to have an appreciation of a mentee’s situation. While empathy is a personal trait, to be able to provide non-judgemental feedback that recognises and respects the mentee, is a learned skill. Identifying the appropriate tactics and strategies to inspire, support and elicit constructive thinking and reflection, are more learned skills needed by mentors.

Mentoring is beneficial for both mentors and mentees, but both parties need to be prepared to give their time, be flexible and be prepared to work towards achieving the desired goals of all parties involved in the mentoring process.